Just because they fixed the link to their official answers doesn't mean they're bothering to update. At least they added more Cyber Key bios, so we know they're still alive over there.

Q: Dear old fart,
1) What's the most derogatory name someone's called you?
2) Approximately how many reside on the shelves? ( Notice, I say approximately. )
3) Did you ever get Thunderblast? ( Chromia. )
4) What do you think of gestalt Minicons? ( I promise, not a spoiler, et cetera. )
A: 1) 'Beep eep' was the worst - no one knows how to curse like an angry Minicon. No, I won't translate it. This is a family page.

2) Somewhere in the area of 160, counting Minicons but not counting kitbashes or the combined form of gestalts. I could tell you an exact number, but you wanted an approximate one.

3) Thunderblast moved into the apartment a few weeks ago. She hasn't done much yet except worry Ransack.

4) Such as ones like Perceptor or the Star Sabre from Armada? Two years after the series ended, spoiler warnings are no longer needed. I can understand ones like Perceptor more than the ones that combine into weapons. Perceptor can reach jars on higher shelves. The Star Sabre just lies there until someone picks it up. I could be wrong - my faculties became swiftly impaired after we declared that we take a drink every time someone in Armada says, "the sword, the shield, and the gun."

Q: Oh Backhanded One,
I have purchased four Transformers Cybertron figures ( Armorhide, Undermine, Clocker, and you ) and they all came with the Speed Planet map. Is this common, or just my bad luck?
A: The maps aren't placed randomly, but with certain figures. It is only in the new figures in recent Waves that the Earth map has been available, though my sources tell me that the Jungle Planet map has just been released. If you're desperate to get it right now, my sources say to buy Downshift or Crosswise.

Q: Do you hold yourself upon a higher value of celebrity status compared to other e-mail columnists such as Red Mage?
A: On this page? We average about three hundred visitors daily. Compare this to your aforementioned Red Mage. His site gets sixty-five thousand visitors daily. I think even a non-robot can do the math here.

Q: Have you ever considered posting on message boards so you answer questions more frequently so you can get it all over and done with?
A: Like I want to answer questions more frequently. More frequency means more people asking how old I am.

Q: Dear all-powerful old coot,
I have a couple of questions for you:
1) Have you visited the website known as Transformers Live?
2) How come you and your Minicon both suffer from 'I've got the front half of my alt mode stuck to my back' syndrome?
3) Do you like hugs?
4) Can you say 'hi' to Wayward for me?
A: 1) Ah, the movie site. I haven't looked at it, though Wayward has. She knows someone has linked her from there, but hasn't been able to backtrace the exact source yet to either thank the linker for the free advertising or to tell him to stop stealing her bandwidth, depending on what's linked and how.

2) Safeguard's transformation is my fault - I'm no engineer, so I based him off my own design. My design, however, is not my fault. I certainly didn't build myself.

3) Only from pretty Cybertronians.

4) Yes.

Q: 1) Do there exist any pictures of Groovinator? If not, can you get someone ( or Wayward ) to make one?
2) What would happen if G1 Starscream managed to bamf into Armada fangirl-style?
3) What's with the little half-sphere cut out of your chest?
A: 1) No pictures exist of Groovinator. Whenever anyone tried to take a picture, his mirrored surface deflected he flash, blew up the camera, and made the photographer go blind. Messing with Minicons can be quite dangerous.

2) The first thing he would do is slap his counterpart silly, then go about trying to take over Cybertron.

3) When they took the Matrix from me, let's just say they didn't do it tidily. I left the cavity open both to remind myself of the dangers of power, and that they couldn't reinstall that horrible disco ball in me again if they tried.

Q: Can you please tell us out of thirty Transformers that you have chosen would win in a thirty 'bot battle, the standard Royal Rumble rules apply. That means that there are no friends, only enemies ... only the last 'bot standing so please tell us who would win?
A: It would come down to a final mud-wrestling bout between Override and Thunderblast. So, basically, everybody wins.

Q: Is Pimping easy to prove us worng we at Cobra bet you and the Insecticons $100 to prove that Pimping Ain't Easy.
Thanks,
Cobra Commander
A: As a robot, the only kind of 'pimping' I'm familiar with is the kind that means 'to make flashier'. Then it depends on the amount of redeco and upgrades that make pimping either hard or easy. Megatron-to-Galvatron is easy pimping. Overhaul-to-Leobreaker is difficult pimping.

Also, update your column.